Fancy an artist date? 🎨
i Feel For You podcast episode 85
You’re listening to I Feel For You and this is episode 85! (You can find all the ways to listen, the shownotes plus archives and other goodies over here!)
I’m Dionne, a writer, VR and installation artist, yoga, somatic movement + embodiment facilitator, dj, creative coach and mentor …amongst other things.
In short, i make things! And share events and experiences for The People. My crossover projects intertwine non-snooty creativity and care, for self and for community, with dollops of joy, darling!
🌈 This podcast is an audio tender meadow of curiosities and explorations of ways to create space, feel more free + remember who you are. Expect: tenderness, creative practices, ideas, inspiration, tools and resources for the journey 🐾🌺
In today’s podcast episode…we’re going on an Artist Date!
Well…kind of.
I’m talking about this tool as a potential portal for your own wonder and delight. A way to ignite or restore your soul, perhaps charge your creative spirt, as well as nurture your yearnings and desires. We’re in the pleasurezone, baybeee! 💦 Sorry i can’t not say it that way, thank you Al Pacino!
In case you wonder why i say baybeee like this all the time, here’s a clip from Heat where Al rocks my world.
Short sidenote: This episode was recorded summer 2020 for my Autumn Take Care of You programme which is a seasonal creativity and self care journey with community connection which has been running in real life and online for the last few years.
I thought it might be nice to share this creative activity with you here on this podcast, as well as in my new home on Substack 👋🏽
Which you can find if you head to dionne.substack.com (hello you are here!) link as ever in the shownotes. I hope it will be a nourishing space for you to land.
Fancy going on a date then?
Hope you enjoy the show!
Creative activity // The Artist Date
I speak about Artist Dates a lot, and had a particularly poignant reminder of the importance of them a few years ago which i wrote and spoke about in the podcast Saying YES to joy and pleasure. The Artist Date is one of the mandatory basic tools that Julia Cameron encourages in her series, The Artist’s Way.
It is the exhale to the inhale (or vice versa!) of your Morning Pages. She explains that the Morning Pages are a “sending” or a way of notifying yourself and the universe of your dreams, dissatisfactions, hopes and yearnings, and so on. During Artist Dates, you are opening yourself up to receive insight, inspiration and guidance. Balance!
So how to “do” an Artist Date? Well, it’s a block of time you allocate to your pleasure each week. Perhaps an hour or two, where you set aside space to nurture your inner artist. To give attention to your creativity and self care. It’s a delicious date with yourself. A practice in nurturing your needs and indulging, pampering and tending to yourself. And it's supposed to be fun! Something that sparks joy!
...I know, i might have put a few of you off with the two-hour thing, right? Ok, so perhaps it’s less time. Or more! But please aim for an hour, ok? And the point is, we do this alone. No trespassers allowed!
If speaking of time for yourself to prioritise joy is bringing up resistance for you, i’d urge you to explore that. Let's do that now!
🥴 Dealing with resistance to the Artist Date
What is getting in the way?
What are you telling yourself?
You can’t afford it? Artist Dates needn't cost any money! I'm sharing some inspiration and ideas below on how you can do this with whatever you've got laying around the house!
Time is too short? What can you do with your practice with boundaries in order to create that extra hour in your week?
And if you need a recap on that, remember last week and this week we've been exploring boundaries so do head back if you need that extra bolstering.
I wonder if you can you humour yourself and just try it out?
Dig deep!
This is a practice in real-life self care. Nurturing yourself as a ritual. And walking the talk. And there will probably be resistance. And i say that as someone who wrestles with it regularly.
So to those of you who also make excuses. Self sabotage. Overwork to hijack putting yourself first: a reminder of that podcast saying yes to joy and pleasure for evidence of me calling myself out on it and offering up some learning moments in the hope that i might save you some time and energy.
What i can tell you, whether you struggle with resistance or not, is that this practice of The Artist Date is invaluable. Your Artist Date will give you so much information. It might be feedback about what you love and have been depriving yourself of, after all this time! The dance class you know your body craves! The playful painting explorations! The new recipes that deepen your interest in Persian cooking! It might offer you feedback in other ways: The grouch might come along to heckle you on your date.
(cue my TERRIBLE voice impressions! very sorry about this!)
“What’s the point of this ridiculousness when you have so much work to do?!” - a sign of you needing to create some more boundaries between work and rest, perhaps?
“Your kids should come first, how selfish of you!” - a reminder that in order for you to be the best parent you can be, your cup needs filling too. 👏🏽
“You’re too (insert whatever applies) old/new/clumsy/proper- to do all those things” - a reminder of how set in our ways we can become and the need for a remembering of our limitlessness maybe?
Use your practice of presence and resilience to pay attention to what’s there. You've been working on this, so it's not new to you. Try not to let the resistance make you think you're having a setback, instead, witness it for what it is. The more resistance you have, the more likely you are, in need of this deep nurturing time. And i say this to you, as someone who struggles with resistance, as i said.
The worst part, is trying to fight it. When you go to look at it for what it is, i promise, there will be some space.
My best advice? Set an actual date for your Date. Make it real. And non-negotiable. Book a ticket if you are going to attend something. Or make arrangements to interrupt the self-sabotage. If you have children, make arrangements to have help in looking after them at that time. And that might mean entertaining them with something to watch or maybe there’s someone in your household that can help you out. Or if you slip back into a patterns of staying late at work unnecessarily so you conveniently miss your date time, set mini alarms to preempt that too, and perhaps even get a friend to check in on you to make sure you do it (accountability is key!)
Remember i’m here for you so tell me about your date, when it is and i’ll be in touch before and after! Go on, put it in the comments and i’ll come and visit! 🙋🏽♀️ (virtually!)
🔧 Other tools:
Use resources from last week’s creative activity the Encyclopedia of Pleasure to help inspire you with ideas and guide you towards your joy! 🤔 Sidenote: would you be interested in me sharing this creative workshop again? Or curious about what an earth it is? Lemmeknow in the comments below!
Also, a Self Care Box might be something you do as a date! More on that in a following chapter.
Create resources for yourself to honour who you are and what you need. In the past i’ve been known to go to fabric stores, to touch things, and go down the fabric conditioner/ candle aisles in the supermarket and into old musty bookshops for my fix of Artist Date (pre-Covid), even for a five minute breather.
Some ideas for you might include going to:
💫 A space of worship - whether you have faith or not, these spaces can sometimes offer a peaceful “restful” environment. And may even remind us to have faith in ourselves.
🌱 A plant shop or garden centre - getting closer to nature even if you are in the city. Growth, no matter the environment.
🌳 A forest - if you are lucky enough to have access. Allow yourself to tune into the rhythm. ForRest.
🏄🏽♀️ A carpet shop - ok am i reaching here? Maybe it's my niche likes. The textures, artistry, muted sound, can be peaceful right?
📚 A library - another one of my favourite places to hang out! Pick a section that resonates. Could be languages. Or photography. Dive into a topic and immerse yourself and see what happens. Most of you know i like to use all kinds of tools to tune in, like books! Ask a question, pick up the book, close your eyes and open to a random page. See what answers behold!
So of course, we have to use our imagination in these times, living in the time of Covid. And i'm sure you can already get creative with the ideas above. For example, going to a place of workshop could mean standing outside. Going to a plant shop could be looking through the window. A forest: maybe you’re lucky enough to live somewhere there’s a lot of space. If you have carpet in your house you could use that and not have to visit a shop. You can also use a book from home if your library is shut. You get the picture. But in case you fancy some more,
Some Covid-friendly ideas might include:
🧳 Take a virtual trip via a film / tv travel show / vlog / Pinterest board (this is how i spend my time, as you might know from ever received my Inspiration Station - more of those on my blog too!)
🎶 Make a playlist to enjoy a bathroom disco. I've been known to take hours indulging in this practice. You could take costume changes, act out skits, and someone who does this well publicly is Roisin Murphy in her quarantine concerts!
🎭 Join a live cultural event online. The National Theatre have been offering free screenings regularly for example, but there's so much to choose from, on a global level, and not all of it has to be via Zoom either!
🍴 Take a cookery lesson via a cook-a-long (lots on YouTube) or dig out that recipe book you haven't used in 6 years (me) and pick something that makes you salivate and set the date to make the deliciousness!
🎞 Join a live class - yoga, dance, drawing, knitting, photography, writing, the options are endless! (Do you know i make and share free yoga, movement, meditation and breathwork videos on my YouTube channel?)
As those of you in my Patreon gang will know, we have Freewrites, which has been so amazing and those will be going on during the winter, so keep your eyes peeled for that and other livestream events if you vibe in resonance, if not, no worries. Skillshare offers 30 day trials - sometimes longer, (as do many other spaces!) Not sponsored!📖 Dig into your own home library - you don't need to own loads of books! Or try a free trial on Audible. Also not sponsored!
🛁 A home spa-day. Make some products from items you have in your home and take a long soak in the bath or shower, followed by a luxurious oil (to balance and support that Vata energy!). Some of you know i used to host potion and lotion making workshops where i shared ideas about how you can create your own products (cause for years i had to make products as a necessity for example, because i couldn't just go to the shop and find products for my hair...) You can create some really glorious products just from items you have laying around the house. If you're interested, here's an old board of some potion + lotion ideas to get you going.
Of course, this is also just a google away as i think it's getting much more popular and accessible to make your own products as a way to invite that new-but-definitely-not-new idea of "sustainability", you know what i'm talking about right? (we've been out here, right?!) It's a lifestyle, not a trend! Anyway! No judgement!
🖼 And cause i’m extra, f you’re looking for more inspiration, here’s a visionboard (of course!) to sink your teeth into, featuring some muses in iconic moments, click and swipe 4 more!
⚓️ Guiding anchor: Map your interests
I thought i'd also offer you some creative prompts as a way to find your guiding anchor and map your interests so that you have a little bit more information to go on, when designing your Artist Date!
📝 Grab your pen and answer the following:
Five topics that interest me are:
Five places that interest me are:
Five people who interest me are:
Five art forms that interest me are: (this might include art you have seen in recent times. I collect mine in my inspiration stations for example, as i mentioned earlier)
Five activities/rituals/projects i could try out are:
I’m interested in how we can allow creativity to light the path for us, so that we can take care of ourselves and create more space. When we feel inspired, connected and interested, our attention takes care of itself! It’s easier to commit to a practice! Not “easy”, of course, because, well, life! But, if we map out what sparks us, it might lead us to an interesting discovery!
So i hope that offers you some inspiration for your Artist Date.
🗣 But i’d love to hear from you - what are you going to do for your next Artist Date? Share below in the comments, i love to hear from you!
Any questions about the Artist Date? Reach out to me! May i be your cheerleader and reminder of how much you deserve to dedicate a weekly ritual to yourself.
For extra inspiration, Ketil wrote about one of his Artist Dates here!
Stuck with a creative project? 😩 Or what to focus on?! 🥴 Let me help you out of a rut! 💁🏽♀️✨
Your online collaborative creative coach (or “wizard”, if you like! 🧙🏽♀️) At your service!
Together we can brainstorm ideas ⚡️
Create maps 🗺
Find clarity 🔮
Build an action plan 🛠
Problem solve 🧩
Solution hunt ✅
Dig into the bigger picture and tiny details🕵️♀️
So you can be on your way 🎟
and feel more inspired 🌱
more easeful 🐛
more centred ⛳️
more clear 👓
and more connected to 🤝
the joy of creativity! 🎨🥁🖌🤹♂️🧵🌈🖍
Wowee. Such a LOT in this here newsletter! I have been resisting Artist Dates for many a year. Perhaps I will force myself into one. Tomorrow. Yes. I will channel Andre 3000 x
Oh my goodness, you offer such a lot of advice and support, its beautiful. I will take a look at your chair yoga video later - perhaps that can be my artists date, because I too resist doing them. Thank you for sharing all that you do x